I'm going to this hot party in Brooklyn this Friday with a girlfriend. I'm super excited!! I have been hanging out with too many older married millionaires. Not only in the sugar life but many of my business clients happen to be the same kind lately. I really need a break from everything and everybody, and I want to flirt with hot young boys so badly!! I will enjoy "me" time. I won't have to pretend to be anything...I will be just myself.
N finally reached out to me today. He asked if we could get together tomorrow since he is leaving town on Thursday. 4 hours later, I replied back: "I can't". That's all I said. He hasn't responded back. People often appreciate things or people only after they lose them. He should have known it was coming. He is so lucky I stuck around for 3 years. But I'm ready to end this nonsense finally...I think. I can't take this excruciating pain anymore. I have been important enough for him to go out of his way to see me for 3 years but I was never special enough to be his girlfriend. I really don't care about how he feels about me anymore. But I do want him to realize how I have been important to him and I want him to regret his decisions. I want him to suffer and I know he will. I don't even fantasize that one day he will realize I'm the one and come after me, like Mr. big did for Carrie in Sex and the city. I just can't stop crying.
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